


Signs

by i_amthecosmos



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Glam Rock RPF
Genre: Grief, M/M, OCD, Sadness, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-16
Updated: 2016-09-16
Packaged: 2018-08-15 09:03:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8050297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_amthecosmos/pseuds/i_amthecosmos
Summary: Adam is still waiting for Tommy. He'll be back, the bluebells say that he will.





	Signs

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this while attempting to write a story for every song on Block Party's Intimacy record. While I fell short, I got some great ideas from it. This one is based on the song Signs, and is basically what it's about. I'm sorry.

Adam counted the flowers edging his sidewalk as he walked back into the house. Twenty-six, that was an even number-good. He opened the door and smiled, calling out “I’m home, baby.” He saw a little swirl of movement and energy from the side of the room.

That night, they talked in bed as they always did. Adam said anything that was on his mind and Tommy always gave the perfect answer to every question. Adam would tell him again and again how much he was loved, and Tommy would duck his head, hiding a smile. 

When Adam woke up the next day, he looked up the astrological sign and decided it was a pretty good one, so he drove to the studio. But on the way there, he saw a wreck on the other side of the interstate and came back. He made sure to drive around his street twice before entering the driveway. 

“You didn’t come into the studio today,” Monte was on the line. Adam sipped a little bit of the ginger beer that he had never liked but that Tommy loved. He shrugged. 

“Yeah, Tommy told me it was a bad idea today so I skipped it.” Adam grinned at the brush of movement near the fridge.

“Tommy told you. Sweetie, Tommy always tells you not to go into the studio.” Monte’s voice was careful and hesitant. Adam took another sip of the ginger beer, savoring the taste. 

“Yeah, I know. I guess it’ll happen when it’s ready, okay?” Adam could hear Monte getting ready to argue about studio time and how his new record had to come out soon, but Adam just changed the subject to the flowers outside his house. Monte listened for a minute and then begged off. 

Adam finished his soda.

The next day it was cloudy, and Adam counted birds as they flew over his backyard. Three bluebirds-that was good. Two ravens-ha, they wore black like him and Tommy. Adam could see Tommy over by the pool, a little drunk and smiling. Adam waved at him and he saw Tommy wave back, then dive in. The pool wasn’t disturbed, but that wasn’t unusual. 

Adam held Tommy even closer that night, trying to breathe in his scent and his love. Tommy let him, holding on so lightly Adam could barely feel it. It was an angel’s embrace, and Adam woke up the next day with tears on his face, but still happy.

“Hey man.” It was LP’s voice on Adam’s messages. “I know it’s been a rough few months, but we need you. We’ve written a lot of music and we need to just record the next record. I know you have your notebook with you all the time, you’ve got lyrics right? Just call me back.” 

Adam listened to it, then erased the message. He did have a notebook but there weren’t any lyrics in it so much as signs. He was getting so many messages from the universe he had to write them down and interpret them later. It was a full time job, and he just couldn’t go into the studio now. Tommy still needed him to be home. He had to be ready.

Adam was in his room, lying on his and Tommy’s bed when his mom called to say she was coming over. Adam really didn’t want to see her, but he loved her and so did Tommy, so he went to open the door. “Oh honey,” she said, and hugged him. Adam hadn’t shaved or dressed today-the messages were bad. His mom made him go shower as she fixed lunch. When Adam got downstairs, there were only two plates. 

“Mom, we need another one, Tommy will be here soon.” His mom went a little white around the eyes when he said it. “I know it’s a bad day-the flowers aren’t right, and there’s only been two bluebirds, but I think he might be back today.” Adam sat down at the table. “These are the wrong plates, we need to get the blue ones-“

“Adam.” Adam looked up and his mother was crying, tears running down her beautiful face. “Adam, please. Tommy’s not coming back. You know he’s not coming back, you were there at the funeral-“ Adam got up and started walking away from her, as she talked and pleaded with him. “-You just stay at home and talk about flowers and birds as if it means something. I think you need to see someone. I know you loved him-“

“I love him.” Adam corrected her. “I love him. And he’s going to come back. I can see him sometimes, mom. He’s almost here, for real.” His mom came closer, and he flinched when she put her arms around him. She was talking, saying the same things everyone else did, about the car accident and Tommy dead before the ambulance arrived, and the funeral, and how Adam needed to see a doctor. It was the same old things. 

Adam held his mother close, pretending to listen to her words as they surrounded him but didn’t penetrate, and in the corner of the kitchen, he could see Tommy frowning over the sandwiches.

Adam was right, those were the wrong plates.


End file.
